spaceship kaj stuff

Kaj is pronouced k-eye by the way. It’s esperanto. Spaceship license if you will.
No one believes that I live on a spaceship! NO ONE. And it’s doing my head in. And I’ve had to take chlorpromazine again tonight because I’ve been crying so much and something about the cpn. I don’t like medics. They are [...]

Monday morning – weeping may remain for a night but joy returneth in the morning

I’ve just had me morning meds (cafetiere coffee, vit pills and cigarrettes). I slept semi okay. I woke up paranoid but now it’s just about gone. Any time I switch on the news (any news, even World Service) it’s setting me off and I so like listening to the radio first thing in the morning. [...]

Satan and microsoft are doing my head in!

And like some infectious protozoa just suggested taking prn so I keep my control or something. Something about symptoms. What? Satan is not I repeat NOT a symptom and neither is like the computer coming alive and infecting my brain with all these random thoughts that make no sense and that Satan then comments on.
Boy [...]

Having ideas of reference

Had to look that up on wikipedia because I wanted to be accurate with what I wrote to you. I want to be as honest and as able with you as I have always been with blogs. I have to confide in someone.
It’s not as bad as it was pre meds in Cambridge where I [...]

Okay I’ve just done the ultimate faux pas

I forwarded an email from Ma onto my friends only realising post pressing send that it had in it the ultimate insult on the email addies thing. THE J WORD!
Oh boy….I think I should hibernate before today gets any worse! I’m going to be like mega embarrassed at AC. You can just guarantee it. Yep [...]

Been summoned to see Dr. C

For tuesday! I’m busy tuesday afternoon so will have to rearrange things! It’s so not good it’s unreal. I’m just sitting here having a quiet girlie freak out thinking should I go back to bed to calm down for half an hour pre studying (which by the way has to be done this am!).
I’m [...]

How it went with my new support worker

It wasn’t fab. The house is a tip and I know that’s why she’s coming to see me but suddenly, after she’s gone, the nerves have gotten really bad and I feel so ashamed and I have little voices in my head jibbering about personality disorder and it’s horrid. I’m trying to relax but it’s [...]

How I feel about the label Personality disorder when it’s attached to my forehead

Okay first things first. Haven’t written for a couple of days basically cos I’ve been well . Now for something I said I should write about a few days and somehow I didn’t. How I feel about the label personality disorder when it comes too close to being attached to my forehead.
It makes me [...]

The bible in MP3 free download

I just found this really cool link for the Bible in MP3 free download .
Click here for more info
Johanino

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my paranoia is back with a vengence

And I have to go out today to get my hair trimmed and get books for Uni and I’m petrified. I read something on calvinist singles about the end of the world and about the persecution of believers in Turkey and I fear I am next on their hit list.
The world hates me because [...]